SMILE ت

Great anniversary

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Me and alex celebratin our one month anniversary last night at orchard.. though it was a short outting but consider as fun =) we went for dinner at Chicago.. had beef steak, calamari.. it was a great dinner as i never tried eating at Chicago with yummy foods!! yea yea.. after meal, we went to HMV to walk walk and alex told me something.. he said 'dear thanks for bringing me joy and shower me with love. previously when i havent attached, i always walked alone in HMV but now i got you, i am happy that i am no longer alone anymore'. I am touched for hearing those words.. i replied him 'dear i promise you we will walk down the road together till we old. Unless you wanted to leave..' he laughed haha.. after that, we planned to go get a drink at boat quay.. actually called chris and anni up but they dont want to come out scare disturb us etc.. rubbish! we're good friends, anything must enjoy together..

us.. enjoying our foods =)

Lately we had a lot of nice foods like mussells, calamari, ice creams, seafood baked rice etc.. last weekend we had chilli mussells at vivo before meeting gwen for kbox session.. a rush one but at least the food was GREAT!! just simply love it muahha.. so long since i had a great meal.. haha my devil training going to start soon le so i cant eat great foods for quite some times le sob sob.. my devil instructor is mr alex tan chin choy.. i wonder how is he going to train me and how long is he going to have that energy towards me..hmmm.. here are the pics of the great foods and great view of sentosa! muackss..

well, he just love those foods =D we love to share the foods together! yummy yummy..

Today at work, i learnt how to scan WFI and transmit everything to head office.. this thing is only can be done by officers (normally).. but i decided to learn from my 'mummy'.. she is willing to teach me how does all the things goes about, she teach me one by one and she said i am a fast learner!! well, there are still a lot of things that i can still learn.. this is something very new to me so i have to write down everything that she taught me.. now started to get used to my current working place.. coming to a month that i am there le, if things still cant get well, then maybe there must be something wrong le..

Till here bahz.. lazy le bleah~

writtern @7:02 AM

Hmmm

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Yesterday Chris mentioned about my ex to alex.. and that course a quarrel session between me and alex.. which is not good... he told alex that my ex look good, decent looking etc.. i mean why he would wanna say all those stupid things to him? test him on what? haiz.. i quarrel and i cried.. he keep on saying that he wanna go for plastic surgery because he doesnt look good at all.. but i scream at him saying i love you because of you not because of anything, if you had decided on doing that then i think i better leave. if he had his plastic surgery, it would not be alex tan anymore! who will he be as????

He wanted to hug me, hold me but i push him away.. i dont want him to do all those things to me just to asking me to forgive him and accept his decision.. no way is my word! dear, i love you because of u not because of anything, if you decided to do that, i dont think i would wanna stay anymore.. its time to say bye bye.. i already had a nightmare in the past and i do not wish that the same nightmare would appear again! haiz...

Anni told me that cindy was pregnant and the guy does not want to be responsible for the thing that he had done.. stupid basket! irresponsible guy will get retribution next life.. those questions pop up inside my mind.. what if one day i noticed that i am pregnant.. what would i do? abort? or wait for 9 months? hmm maybe i should abort it.. well, i dont know, maybe i am stupid.. i know kids are always the innocent one but how bout the parents? do they have the income and everything the best for the kids? i got no idea.. i asked alex about this question before.. he just told me, married lor.. i will be responsible for it.. i am glad that he would say that but, our income not stable, no nothing at this age.. hmmm maybe i shouldnt have think that much also..

Tomorrow, is our 1 month anniversary.. planned to go chicago to have beef steak as our anniversary meal and after that, drop by maybe boat quay or clarke quay for a drink to celebrate the joyness.. i seriously hope that we can last till the end of the day.. i love him lots lots

writtern @8:42 AM

Dear dear ignoring me....

Friday, April 24, 2009

Today, dear dear has been ignoring me since afternoon..he decided not to talk to me, i got no idea why.. went to eat steamboat but both of just keep quiet and like angry me or something like that.. i already told him that i not feeling well, but he still decided not to talk to me haiz.. nice dinner but end up lao sai..

Working the whole day, whole body aching and feel bloated and feel like vomiting.. that's why i decided to buy sour plum.. and guess what, chris, anni and bin an thought i got bibi liao!! omg, how could it possible when i just finish my mense??? weirdooooo lolx.. but alex does not seems to understand me and angry me! huhu i sob :'(

And after that we talked things out and settle everything. it's just misunderstanding.. a little bit bo liao.. but what to do, relationship problem must always faster solve, or else going to accumulate it until one day it will going to burst out!! i dont wan.. i want to be with him till i die :S i love him!!

I am tired, going back home le.. =)

writtern @7:00 AM

Lately...

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Finally i'm having my off again!! i am soooo happy because at least there is a day for me to rest.. i'm going to be like a zombie soon le :( yesterday went to play tennis with bin an, bin an's fren and alex..play awhile and end up me and alex went for jogging instead.. do some basic b.u.t.t camp thingy.. and today some part of my body aching.. hmm lucky tomorrow i dont need to work lolx...

Lately i've been thinking too much, about me and alex, about my work, about everything.. yesterday my mom called me and asking if is alex serious with me.. at first i say he is but hmm i dont know whether the answer is yes or not.. maybe i should have trust him because he is my dear now.. guys, it's hard to be trusted sometimes.. so cant be helped..but sometimes all those stupid things would just pop up inside my brain.. i think i think too much.. this is not the right way in a relationship. i dont wish to spoil everything i had now, i dont wish to hurt him or myself.. i wonder how long can we actually last for? i wanted to last for very long till i die but hmm.. can we lasted that long? or only we can last for a few months? i totally got no idea.. which one is the best for me? i totally got no idea at all hmmm

Me emo-ing... got nothing to do, nothing to talk etc... to my dear dear, if u happen to read this blog, i would like to say sorry for everything.. please do not blame me.. i dont want to think all those stupid things.. but.. hmm sorry

writtern @4:11 AM

Wulalala

Saturday, April 18, 2009

We're getting a chihuahua soon! waiting for the new member to come into our lives =) hope that we can be a good dog parents for the little doggie lalala.. today is fifi's 1 yr old birthday.. my sister in law going to get her a birthday cake and other treats haha.. on last thurs there's another maltese named faye stayed at my house.. for 2 weeks because the owner went to UK for holiday..wow lucky them.. at this time of point they still have the mood and money to go holiday hmmm envy them..

We had decided to go KL from 19/06 - 22/06.. wonder how is the trip going to be like muhahah.. Mr jian rong's gf not going because she cant get any leaves for herself because her colleague need to take leave as well.. hmmm poor little thing.. for me, i already settled my leaves yea!! waiting for the holiday to come.. hahah love holidays love shoppings love doggies lolx

My work, there are always ups and down.. starting to get better le.. got a god mother there.. IVY LONG haha she's my bank officer.. she's funny haha.. she treat me not too bad, first one to treat me good as well.. anyway, i got nothing to do also.. hahaha maybe meeting gwen and anni for some shopping for our dear dear lol.. shall see how bah.. i love my dear!! hehee

writtern @7:55 PM

Still outside

Monday, April 13, 2009

Well, it's 1038pm and i am outside with chris, alex, bin an and anni at lan shop.. they were playing while anni sleeping.. and me, online-ing + blogging.. a little bit bo liao but i got no choice cuz i dont wish to fall asleep in this place.. first, too noisy second, a bit erm.. dont know how to comment.. this is my first time i step into a lan shop around this area at parklane.. feels weird but hmmmm..

After work, went to meet them at sin ming.. as usual, prawning uncles need to train more so that they can be better =) so after that, went to isetan.. thought we could buy something from there because bin an got $50 voucher.. but end up got nothing to buy lolx.. bin an gave me $20 taka voucher instead lol..next time we go shop shop ok hahaha.. end up we bought one japanese pudding which my dear craving for it haha.. it was a nice one, end up he ate up 2 instead.. cant resist it! yummy i would say so..

Tiring day.. i will be leaving soon from this place because i need to work tomorrow.. i am seriously tired.. need some rest.. stomach pain again, dont dare to let him know, dont want him to worry.. i will be fine =) hopefully.. it has been 5 days since the pain started.. hmm wondering when will it be recover.. arghh miss good foods..

writtern @7:38 AM

Me and dear's outting

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Me and alex having lots of great fun.. its a blessing for me to have him.. lucky got him or else me will seriously just end my life.. here are some of our pics while we're in TCC bugis, rotting there, had 2 cold drinks and 1 coffee.. it's nice! we just keep taking pictures non stop.. went shopping and movie.. bought necklace and a pair of platform shoes.. nice one because he helped me to choose! me giddy now.. =(

more to come but too lazy to upload lolx.. miss outting with everyone.. me like a prison birdie :(

writtern @4:43 AM

Emo-ing

Well, just reached home and i decided to lock myself up in my room.. scaring my brother to come back and yell at me.. every time if i never come back he would yell at me and saying all those bad words to me.. i hate staying with them now.. now seriously making me regret to move in and help them pay for their renovation loan.. i decided to help you all up is because you guys said you all need help.. but i help nothing good comes to me except locking my freedom.. once again i told them i am 24 i have my legal age not to come back home or go out.. i have my legal age to have bf and my bf is treating me way better then anyone does.. but seems like they doesnt understand me well enough..

Havent have my dinner yet, dont intend to eat or drink.. let me die suan le.. life like this really fucking idiot and really makes me feel like ending my life suan le.. but there's a lot of things for me to think thru before i did it.. like my friends who treat me well (chris, anni, bin an) and my beloved dear.. how i wish i can just moved out from my current place and find a new place to stay.. i am like a homeless ghost, wandering around.. i need a home all by myself, who can give me? i started to dislike my family again le =( the feeling was back to 9 years ago.. i hated them for locking me for so long and finally i am adult and yet they decided to lock me once again.. what the hell they want from me!! i seriously got no idea..

Even if i decided to make a police report, police might end up tell me, girl, you're an adult now, go make your own decision.. they do not have the right to control you anymore.. arghh everyday i just dont feel like coming back home at all.. because of the people around me makes me feel like i'm inside a prison instead.. can i just go die instead? sick of the life i have with my family members.. sucks!

writtern @4:30 AM

FREEDOM!!!

Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Was actually having dinner with my ex branch people at sembawang there.. it was a great dinner outting where i get the chance to meet up with them again =) sadly to say, i cried again cuz i really dont like my current branch, hoping i can transfer back to there again.. maybe its because it's a new place so i need time to adapt to the new environment and new to everything.. working style not the same at all, sad :( we had seafood dinner.. the crabs wow! its nice super duper nice.. cherie just couldnt resist it at all.. 2 tables couldnt finish up their crabs but our table especially cherie ate super alot of it muahaha.. my boss keep calling her as yuan yuan muahhahaha.. great dinner last night, talking about what we encounter at the new branch, how the new branch people react to us etc.. been eating, drinking and smoking lolx, a great outting =) miss them so much.

After dinner, Kelvin drop me at salvation army there to meet up with alex they all at sin ming prawning.. these two uncles really loves prawning haha.. and something happened to me.. my 2nd brother called me all the way from Hong Kong scolding me because i go back home late.. everyone keep calling and scolding me! i feel sick and get irritated.. hello, i am 24 and i have my legal age to go out and get married and do whatever i want!! not as if i am 15 yrs old.. that was 9 years back.. if i am still 15 i allow you to control me but now.. I AM 24~!! now super angry with them.. after hang up, i went to ladies and my mother called for 9 times non stop.. when i returned her call, she scolded me again.. end up me and her quarrel :( it's not that i disobey her or what, but i need freedom and i know what am i doing.. i wont hurt myself and also wont letting other people to hurt me as now i have bf to take care of me as well.. arghhh angry..

1145pm i left sin ming and alex told me he would be my angel to guide me along and be with me.. i am so touched with what he had told me.. i noticed i love him more then i can say.. when i reached home, my first brother locked the main door and dont allow me to go in.. i knock the door and finally he opened up.. he asked you need to come back home? i thought you do not have home to go.. i never talk much with him, just ignore him and walked straight into my room.. i noticed that me more and more like a cinderella, need to return home by 12am or else me going to turn into a monster.. hate those feelings sia argghhh i want freedom!!!

Here are some of my outting pics =)

sharon tay and me

there are more pics but i am way too lazy to upload cuz i'm tired..

writtern @5:45 AM

Others

Monday, April 6, 2009

It was a great outting day with alex.. this is our first time we went out together as a couple holding hands and joking with each other.. the feeling was just great.. though it was raining but the weather is just sooo great.. hmm me fall sick instead.. so today took mc :( we went out to bugis to fix our watch and took neo print and after that went for dinner and movie at PS.. we've been together for erm coming to two weeks? and this is our officially first time out as a couple!! i just love the feeling being with him :D

Yea yea i finally got POSB account again! i think every month i gonna park $200 inside le.. or else i gonna spend like water like that.. it's time to save up for rainy days le :) me getting older and older day by day.. so hmm prepare for emergency usage lolxx.. i just park $1k inside.. and now waiting for my pay to come in again yea lolx!! haiz me so broke now.. gotta save up for my holiday trip soon le =) chris, maybe we should just get airplane to kl instead of taking bus.. what do you think huh?

I just noticed that i got super duper a lot of split ends.. arghh i sad cuz of it :( i do not have split ends when i was having my straight long hair, but after i perm arghh everything changed sia.. i think it's time for me to do something about it le, whether to cut it short or do some treatment (but does treatment really works on split ends?) from what i know is cut short is the best way.. anyway mr alex commented on my hair saying it was too long =( arghh sad sad sad

Gotta go get prepared for dinner outting with my ex branch people already.... though a little bit lazy to go but.. still have to go.. lolx see ya!

writtern @2:26 AM

Hmm

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Everything goes well between me and alex =) thanks for all the blessing from all the people.. alex was hospitalise on wed and whole day and night i was with him.. take care of him though there was nurses with him but i just dont dare to left him alone in hospital.. when they push him in the operation room, i got a sore pain in my heart and my tears drop.. i got no idea why is it so.. most likely i scared.. a few house later he came out telling me he's in great pain, so i accompanied him all the way till morning =) there after i went to work from his place.. i count money till half way, i nearly fainted lolx.. lucky i still can managed to finish up my work muahaha..

Me and chris was planning to go Bangkok in July.. I cant wait to go with them, sure will be a great time there.. me, alex, anni, chris and his gf and yi ling will go =) bangkok is actually a great place for shopping especially for girls! this time round i will bring them to go to baiyoke sky for dinner! love the place!! but we got no idea which hotel to choose yet.. airline should be on tiger cuz it's cheap!

Wish anni all the best in searching for her mr right.. and i hope my mr right stops here.. i dont wish to change bf anymore! i love alex! i love everyone! muacks

writtern @2:51 AM